Thank you for the past three months. I guess you've tried your best to give me what I really wanted & now, I thank you for that. :) I know, I haven't give you the best & I guess I got you the worst. Whatever that I'm saying now no longer occurs to you. Well, you no longer care 'cos the one who's hurting is me, not you. I know you're tired, I can sense that. I was hoping you'd be more honest with me about your feelings but no, you didn't. I thought previously we promised that we wouldn't overlook things? But we did, time & time again. I wonder if you're feeling the same way as I do. 'Cos I'm tired about all these too, just that I'm willing to try again, for you. But yet I'm feeling fucking down. I hate it whenever it's a one sided kinda thing. Do you understand what I've been trying to tell you, show you? Perhaps you don't, or you will never. I want you to know how I exactly feel right now. 'Cos the pain's unbearable, that was why I reacted that way. You know what has been going on in school, at home. My family, my friends & you, all gone all of a sudden. You promised you'd stay & never walk away. But this time, I know you had to. I'm sorry; I caused you all these hurt, pain, breathless days. For the past three months, you taught me a lot of things. I guess this time I fell hard. I thought you'd catch me when I fall this time but no. It's okay, I still wanna thank you for that 'cos you made Glynis learn. You taught me how to control my temper towards my mom, you taught me how to talk nicely to my dad, you taught me how to study hard, you taught me that actually life isn't that terrible, just be positive, you taught me what was self-confidence, you taught me what was love & what love can actually do to one. Now I know this all. & thank you. :) And also, the fantasies you gave me, our non-existance Forever, thanks a lot. All the ways you tried hard to make me believe your feelings are true, thank you. I appreciate all that you've done for me.I hope someday you will still run back in my arms, yearning for my love. I'd wait for you, til you come back. I'd still hug you & tell you I'm here. I'd never leave you. Please be reminded that Glynis loved you once & she still do, she always will. I wish you'd be in my shoes now & know how I feel. Images of us, you & the happiest I when I was with you, keep flashing in my mind. They're just memories & I will keep them. The ring, the photos, the prints, everything you gave. I don't know what to say but they'll be in my memory box as well as in my heart, always.Thanks for acting like you cared.It was nice to know that you're there.So much for my happy ending.
2:53 PM
Mend this broken thing./
(
)
Baby will you come back to me?
Hm, school was fun today! :D though nothing got into my head. :\ I just can't concentrate luh. Morning we had Eng with Mrs Soon. She just scolding us like crazy 'cos of some class issues. I think it's so retarded. I mean, such stuffs ought to be solved outside class time & not with her. :\ But I guess what she said was right. Her reflection this morning was right too. Like what Merlene had on her MSN nickname, Best thing in life are not free.. :) Wasted the whole period scolding. Then was Chinese. Miss Lim asked me where's my worksheet & I was like, in the file lor. I looked at her & smile. Then she was like, talk talk talk right? & I said, yeah. Bestaye laughed. Hahah. After Chinese, the horror came. It was SS & it's uber boring. I tried to pay attention & I end up talking to Qiaos. :XX She was telling us about how great Mrs Soon is, how much effort we must put in, compare us wtih other NA clssses & all that. Yawns! Then it was Maths. Quite fun luh, did quizzes & I realised all along I wronged about interquatile range. Tsk! But I hope I got it right this time. :\ Yeah it was SS again. Ugh, falling asleep, I swear! Geez, how boring can it get. Recess & joyjoyjoy! I saw Sharilyn :D & I hopped on her. & she got shocked. Hahah! Hm & it was SS after recess. Stupid timetable. Did a little work & fooled around with Qiaos. Damn funny. We sang Drowning again & I swear that song was killlllllllling me. I'm upset enough & she kept singing like some spoilt radio. Damn funny. Bestaye was like "This song again!? -faints" Hahah after SS was English!
Me : Are you thinking what I'm thinking, B1?
Bestaye : I think I am B2.
Me : It's scolding time!
That was what I told Bestaye. We had scoldings & naggings & lectures all morning. Got a lot of English homework, due on Monday. >:( My weekends! Ok, actually I plan to stay home on Sunday & finish up the work so I can go school happily on Monday morning. Don't have to worryt so much about undone homework. :D YAY SO SMART! :] then was Chemistry! Omg the best lesson ever. We did it the BINGO way maaaan! :D Hahah played Bingo & Miss Su was uber pissed with us. Hahah & we still continued played. Hahah! Bestaye even pulled her stool over from another bench to play with us. :D Funfunfun. x) All of a sudden, Chemistry no longer mean a bit to me. 'Cos Chemistry, I promised you I'd study hard for it & I did it all for you but I guess.. No more. :\
LJS for lunch! No Chinese remedial 'cos Mr Sim had swim heats :D Ok, I pray every Thurs from now on, he has swim heats :D Hahah. Had fun talking & al, LRT-ed down to Compass. Something stupid happened on the way. To Qiaos & I. How stupid. Oh & Sass threw my bottle towards my head tday! Omgz, evil pig. Still dare to say she's good at throwing, bullshit. Hahahah!
No, you know what? I still agree that Glynis Tan is ever so innocent. :D Hahaha. They are gonna kill me. :
I'll go do up her present & finish up my Literature homework. :D I'm a happier girl, NOT. Ugh. >:( I'm still harping on it. I mean, I didn't want to but if I don't then what am I supposed to do? ):
I feel as though I'm joining Qiaos in the Singlehood man. ): I don't like but.. :] I'm okay. anyway, some shoutouts. Thanks Pert, for the text tday. Really thoughtful of you. Thanks for the little angel though I can't see it. Hahah I was rushing to class so I didn't see it luh. After class when I went to see it, hahah it's kinda outta place but yuh, thanks! I'm okay yeah & thanks for being there. I'm much better now. :) Josh, thanks for concerning. :) Hahah we'll talk soon ok 'cos I no longer see my name on your nick & I'm gonna whine to you soon. Bleah! :] Cheryl! thanks babe, you're the sweetest of all & I love you ok. I'll be able to pull this through I guess. :) Ok I'll call you at three in the morning. :D No just kidding. (:
I'm meeting Xavier tmr. :) Trigger happy. No more false hope, I hope. :\ I'll probably jump off the building luh if that happens. ): Saturday, somewhere with Bestaye in the morning & Queenstown & Ikea with Sassy, Yj & Qiaos! :D I'm buying Dunks, yes dunks. Like finally :D I'll get my school shoes there too. Ikea, the film strips! :D Omg!!!!!!
Homework time! Arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrgh.
I love you & I'm afraid to say.
If you wanna cry, cry on my shoulders
<3,
5:26 PM
Mend this broken thing./
(
)
The hardest thing was to let you go
You're a Romantic Realist
What Kind of Girlfriend Are You?
Brought to you by Tickle
Click on the photo to see the details! :D
I didn't know I was someone like that but acks, the quiz might be lying.
It's still hurting but I'm pretending I'm okay.
I'm back from piano & I spent quite a bit. =\ Few magazines & my stationaries. :) I guess buying magazines make me a happier girl. She called & it made me a even happier girl but the conversation was.. cold & kinda weird. I feel weird, I don't know why. Just finished a little of dinner by the way. Gonna go off early tday 'cos daddy wants to use the comp. >:@
I'm still texting her. I wonder if she's gonna call tonight. Ok shut up glynis. I ought to give her space on her own to think about it right? Tsk, fucker.
I can take the rain on the roof of this empty house
That don’t bother me I can take a few tears now and then and just let them out
I’m not afraid to cry every once in a while
Even though going on with you gone still upsets me
There are days every now and again I pretend I’m ok
But that’s not what gets me
{Chorus}
What hurts the most
Was being so close
And having so much to say
And watching you walk away
And never knowing
What could have been
And not seeing that loving you
Is what I was tryin’ to do
It’s hard to deal with the pain of losing you everywhere I go
But I’m doin’ it
It’s hard to force that smile when I see our old friends and I’m alone
Still Harder
Getting up, getting dressed, livin’ with this regret
But I know if I could do it over
I would trade give away all the words that I saved in my heart
That I left unspoken
{Chorus x2}
Not seeing that loving you
That’s what I was trying to do
Nice song. It made me tear like how The Way I Do did. ): I'm crying almost every minute of my life today, except in school. There's another song that's really nice & meaningful. Aw, it makes me wanna cry. I wanna have better days ahead, with you.
You packed in the morning, I stared out the window
And I struggled for something to say
You left in the rain without closing the door
I didn't stand in your way.
But I miss you more than I missed you before
And now where I'll find comfort, God knows
'Cause you left me just when I needed you most
Left me just when I needed you most.
Now most every morning, I stare out the window
And I think about where you might be
I've written you letters that I'd like to send
If you would just send one to me.
'Cause I need you more than I needed before
And now where I'll find comfort, God knows
'Cause you left me just when I needed you most
Left me just when I needed you most.
You packed in the morning, I stared out the window
And I struggled for something to say
You left in the rain without closing the door
I didn't stand in your way.
Now I love you more than I loved you before
And now where I'll find comfort, God knows
'Cause you left me just when I needed you most
Oh yeah, you left me just when I needed you most
You left me just when I needed you most.
Actually I should put all these in my lyrics page but I don't know why am I posting it here. :\ Acks, I'll put them up when I have the time. I'm like rushing. = Forever by Damage's playing. ):
Last night I had my loudest cry & I swear I never felt like this before. Like my heart was ripped apart. Geez, I didn't know that I actually love Xavier this much. Perhaps she don't know but well.. :] John Mayer's Comfortable's making me feel so emo. -takes penknife. :D Hahah Bestaye! Omg, talking about Bestaye. Hm, thanks a trillion for the talk babe. Like throughout the day! :D Thanks luh, I'll be strong. :] Qiaos! You're the bestest already luh. I bet I looked awful this morning. I knew I'd tear when I let out the news to you. Love you both, lovelies.! Pert & angie, thanks for the encourage & al this morning. Pert you're one of the bestest friend I will ever have ok, offer to drive me around & now you promised the next time I'm down you'd be there. Omgz, I thank God for lovely friends like y'all. :) though all these cheerups & al didn't made me feel better but thank you, realllllllllly. :)
Cheryl, thank you. :) I love you, you know that. We'll meet up soon ok? Promise! :D I'll make time for lovelies like the CherylS. :D
I want to do more quiz leh. Tsk!
Even if you take my heart & tore it apart,
I'll love you still forever. :]
<3,
6:06 PM
Mend this broken thing./
(
)
GOODBYE.
Should I go on haitus? I feel like going MIA. :\ I'm so numb by the pain.
So.. this love got ditched yeah. It's about faith, that's what you're telling me. It's about this fucking stupid test we have to go through, that was what I told you. I hate this. I swear they're laughing hard in their hearts now. I wonder how did I even play that pretence game tday. Fake fronts, lying to almost everyone about what's going on. Pretend like I don't care, like it doesn't hurt at all. I don't know what the fuck was I doing at school today. What's the fucking whole purpose of attending school today? I tried my bestest to concentrate but my mind just kept thinking about you. Yeah, you feel the pain, you cry, you feel hurt, you cry. I'm feeling it twice 'cos I'm still hanging on, don't know what's my next big step. Let it go, start life all over again? Keep waiting like some fucking loser & get no reply? Cry, silt & have suicide thoughts everyday when you don't even care? Yknow if I ever have to choose, I will never fall in love. I will never. I'm not saying now but ages ago when I start falling for Benjamin(this cute guy in my class), I'd tell myself it's wrong & I'll try hard to get out of it.
Do you understand what I'm going through?
I tried all ways to make myself not think about you. I threw away the anniversary letter, I told myself don't bother about Saturday, I kept the ring in the memorybox. But there's so much more that still reminds me of you. The walk home, the void deck, everything. I can't forget your back when I walked towards you at my house void deck when we first met. Now it hurts, badly.
I still wish I could have you back. Be reminded that I'm willing to make all sorts of sacrifices just to be with you. I know these are just words but I'm true, true about them. I'm sorry if I make you hurt, make you cry. For the past three precious months with you, I sure did learn something.
I love you, always have & always will..
3:51 PM
Mend this broken thing./
(
)
Love me, leave me & rip me apart
Val's mail came in just now & I teared. She talked about her aunt who just passed away last week. She reminded me about Granny & the past, like what I told baby last night over the phone about Granny & I. ):):): I will get over it soon. I planned to spend more time with Granny from now onwards. I'll bring her to her favourite place. I hate life & I hate death even more.
Anyway, I had a great day at school though I was uber tired & sad. :) The girls made the day better, thankyou sexys.! Hm no homework tday & I'm so happy. Got tuition later. :) Like finally after so long. Bio test tday & I think I'm gonna fail. I suspected there was gonna be one but I didn't bother to ask, how lazy. Maths was only 5 mins & we did a little quiz. English was fun tday though I'm fucking tired & not listening. heehee. :D Mrs Soon showed us a video & it's something like a life lesson kinda video. Look at things at a different perspective, don't give up easily, etc. I agree to all these but I've not met them yet. Whoo, I will soon. Ha. :) Chinese was pure madness. She kept looking at our direction. & fuck, how much I hate chinese lessons. She think that my chinese is as fluent as hers, like some china kid. Hello, 52/100 student who needs extra chinese remedials, what else can you expect from her? I passed & she should be happy with that. Better than I fail right, tsk. Art was H to the O to the R to the R to the I to the L To the E. Whole class was so pissed with her shouting & screaming, slamming tables & throwing things. All that noisy bang! sound. Damn annoying. The mood for drawing is already gone before we could even walk into her classroom. She yelled before we went in. Ugh, I hope her mood tmr becomes better man. If not the whole class is gonna kena from her again luh, for like 5 hours!? =
After school, I went to have lunch with Choo sisters, Bestaye Chanel & Mariel. Hahah, two retards, I like! :D Ho, lunched at the food court & we had so much fun crapping. Mariel laughed like some sick laugh machine. Hahha. Went down to Mac's to get Bestaye's ice cream cone & walked around. Wanted to print the picture in my phone but ay, it didn't worked. Fuckhead(new word ay!). So yuh, had bubble tea & sat at compass heights. Talked, laughed, crapped. Damn funny, I swear. Geez, Mariel's damn retarded! Omgz, I had fun & went home at 4 :D
While I was on my way home, Miss Grizel Tan came into my mind. That stupid girl's at camp now & I miss her already. It's only a day, omg. I wonder what the hell is that retard doing now. I realised I do love Zel, no matter how annoying she is. Like how baby love Joel no matter how angry he can make her. It's just that we both don't show it, I guess. At least Joel hugs & kisses baby before he goes to school. Like aw, so sweet. (: Hahah, I'm not so mushy to my sister la. Hahah. Tuesday's gonna come, I don't care. & I'll be watching dachangjin alone tonight! >):
They were never listeners. I thought they were but I was wronged. They were never called friends. I thought they'd keep their word for being there but none was. ): Perhaps I was thinking too much. I guess I'm gonna keep everything to myself from now on. Perhaps it's safer this way then no one will say that you talk too much. Ho. :
Eliza, talk soooooooooon. ):
& I thank you for being who you are all these while. You're well appreciated by yours truly & I still love you, want you, need you even though you might not feel the same way. (:
> I miss you so much today.
Tmr & the day after tmr.. Until I see you again.
I already did.
Miss you. ):
I miss you.
): OK CUT THE CRAP. :
'Cos this is not a mistake, it's a start of a new beginning;
<3,
5:13 PM
Mend this broken thing./
(
)
Big words, recycled phrases & the bittersweet taste of other boys on your lips
Went aunt's place. :D I managed to hoax Jermaine to sleep. That sweet little girl slept for almost the whole afternoon & the afternoon for cousin & I was so pleasant. Watched the telly, channel 55. :D I forgot what's the show title. Watched a little of MTV & after that changed to the korean vcds aunt bought for mom. It's in chinese 'cos aunt bought wrongly. Heh, I laughed evilly at mom. She wants it in Korean. So now I can watch it without having to change to Nicam or Mono on the telly. :D Cats on the Rooftop, that's the title of the vcds. Hm quite nice. Jermaine woke up & I tried to make her go back to sleep again but failed. I asked her the forth time & she said she wants to get up. Ok, actually it was my fault. I was playing with her & she became energetic. :XX
She got up & I went to sleep. Rofl, damn tired 'cos I slept at 5am last night. >:@ Talk about this later. Slept for an hour & ate dinner. Texted baby the whole day. She hasn't reply since I had my dinner. Boo, I guess she's sleeping or something. Bah! Went back home after that.
On a lighter note, Zel's going for Camp tmr & I'll be alone till Tuesday. :D Hohoho! x) Damn happy. Ay wait, actually no. I'd miss her. (I hate to admit that) I'd have no one to disturb other than Mom(she has become one of my targets, haha), no one to share my fuckedup day with, no one to complain to, no one would answer when I call "Fatty". Ok, I know I'm damn evil(cos I'm much fatter than the way she is) but she calls herself "Big butt". -.- & my maid's her "small butt". (Actually it's good, we're more like friends ay). I will survive without that retard for two days & a night. I've got my retard girlfriend to entertain actually. :)
Granny isn't looking good. :\ She's becoming like some bamboo stick & I don't like but I don't have a choice. Now she tell us that she actually regret not listening to advises in the past. Like mom, she always tell Granny not to eat so much sweet & salty food but Granny just don't listen. Then now.. ): I hate the feeling of I-know-I'm-gonna-lose-her-soon. 'Cos that was what happened to dad's eldestsister which makes her my aunt. She amputated her left leg all the way to her thighs, stayed int he hospital for very long & there she goes up to heaven. Though the both of us aren't close like other aunts, there's a bond between us. Like dad's stepmother, I call her Granny. She lloves me, that was what everyone tell me. Once, during CNY, I went up to her place for lunch & she bought some egg-slicer for me. For me, yes. I wonder why she did that too. Until she told me this, "Girl ah, egg very big. I bought this for you. Easier to cut ok. Come I show you, later you go it yourself ok." At that time, I was still young, in Kindergarden 1. I didn't know what was all that about, until recently. I looked into the photo album & I teared. We went Bangkok together once & we took a photo together. I was scared but Godma insisted. So I did, stand next to her & al. At her funeral, I didn't dare to look at her in the coffin but I cried. When they pushed the coffin into the burner, all I could do was just pray that she rest in peace. The scenario at that very moment, still plays in my mind sometimes. The same thing goes for Grandpa. I was in Primary 1 when he passed away. Mom told me over the phone & I cried like mad. We weren't close but I can feel that he loves me a lot, just like how he loved dad. Mom asked me to fake tears behind the coffin & I didn't. The tears were real. But I was glad when I know that Grandpa didn't die of illnesses but he died in his sleep. Gawd, how much I wanna go back to the past & cherish the memories.
Hm.
Life & Death.
They cause misery, sometimes.
Oh 5am! I got home after dinner at 9pm yesterday. Decided to do some work before I start using the com & hog on the phone with baby at night. She went pub with her family to celebrate her mom's birthday. No texts, no missed calls. I texted her a few times using Zel's phone & there was no reply still. So I watched the telly until 2am & she finally replied. Gawd, I was still so clear & I still got the patience to wait. I kept telling myself not to blow up. Yeah & she called at 245am. All the way till 4plus going 5am, nothing else but silence. I don't wanna mention what we talked about. I was in fucking pain 'cos of one thing she said. I hung up & thought, why did I even have the paitence to wait for like 6 hours!? Sigh, glynis oh glynis.
Cheryl, I'm right here if you ever need someone. :)
The same thing goes to Cel. ♥
Marcos Hernandez's The Way I Do is nice. :)
Now I can't go on without you
I'm naked, I cant fake it.
I'm not that strong without you
Never thought I could love you the way I do.
:]
Agree?
I do. :]
I'm left with english news articles' reflection part. :D Yay, I'll do it later & I'm all ready for school. I realised I haven't taken a photo with the girls for a very long time. Hm, I wanna go Prata House tmr! Anyone? :]
Never thought I could love you the way I do,
<3,
7:49 PM
Mend this broken thing./
(
)
Maybe someday you & I can have one more shot
Baby called& we talked a little just now. Uploaded the pictures in the cam & edited them. (: Baby's at Sengkang, block 255 :D how near. But nothing to be excited about 'cos I still won't be able to see her. Pfft. :
Oh! I was looking at my cell's wallpaper & I remembered what happened yesterday. I'm gonna mention it. xD Baby did something with the curry sause, I'm gonna print it out on Monday at the photo shop. :D Heh.
There's dinner again tonight at the restaurant. >): Baby's going pub tonight. & I've to wait for her again. Hm, I'm sure she's gonna be back damn fucking late & I might not be able to wait up for her. So I'm gonna sleep now. Hahah. Catch few winks!
Eliza babe, we must talk more! I like talking to you. SP together someday ok!
<3 I love you!
Reading your notes over & over again
<3,
3:55 PM
Mend this broken thing./
(
)
I only see myself with you
So I told myself, disappointment comes once in awhile in life to makes us stronger & I'm actually quite tired of saying that. I say that to make myself feel better. I mean, it's true & I thought of that to make myself feel better. Sigh, so sick of all these. ): & when I keep repeating them, they no longer comfort me like how it used to in the beginning.I'm happy. But I can't say that I'm truly happy. Perhaps part of me is, the other isn't. I can't eat, I can't sleep well. I woke up at 8 this morning & lazed around in bed till 11 for baby's text. Enough said hur, I'll be fine. I don't know when but.. soon. Sigh.I wanna go out. Out of this fucking house. It's damn empty. Everyone's out, I should have just tag along. Fuck. Baby can't fucking go out 'cos of some fucking reasons I don't know what. I think was 'cos her dad was coming back. Whatever it is, I'll be just fine. =/ & baby, I'm not blaming you or whatever. I'm just feeling frustrated yeah. I'll be fine.Bestaye's with bf, Sassy's with gf, Qiaos's going out with her friend.Supposed to join Sass but no, baby can't go, I'm not going either, how bright.
Qiaos asked me to join them but no, the two friends haven't meet up for awhile, it'd be so weird if I'm there. & I'm not even close to that friend of hers.I'll find some form of entertainment at home, somehow, in one way or another. If not when my hair dries, I'll go to sleep until tonight. No thinking, no crying, no sucide notes/thoughts. Pack your bags now & get away, they're catching unto us.I took 1hour 18 mins & counting to finish my lunch. I really don't feel like eating, I just plain squeezing it down my throat 'cos if I don't eat now, I won't have anything till tonight. Fuck, I'm still feeling ________.I'll blog later when my memory decides to let me remember what I actually thought of blogging just now.Cheryl & I are talking on msn, how happy. I miss that pretty many. :)REPLIES!
NING, No spamming done dearie! Chinese sucks la. Even the chinese teachers suck. Ugh she keep coming over to my table & look what I'm doing. Hahah. I hate it when she look at me.
QIAOLIN, You better start working hard. We'll study out soon ok, study die us! :D
SHARILYN, Opps, I did it again! Hahah. I love you shar. (:
CAROLINE, We gotta talk soon ok! I miss you la.
XAVIER, I think I've said my piece in my texts, so yeah. Don't worry ok baby. I'm sure things are gonna be fine. I know my entry doesn't sound fine but I will be. You know how fast I'll recover, somehow. It doesn't really matter actually, not spending enough time together. I guess your dad just want you to be home & spend less time with people like me. That's what I thought. What's more when he knows where you go, who you meet up with. You know he doesn't like you being a _______. Just make him happy for once ok. :) We still text, we still talk on the phone what. Don't worry ok. Though I know it was gonna be a disappointment but when you let out the truth, my heart ached a little. We had so much heartaches this month & I think April's gonna be a better month. All these unhappiness will be over soon. When school reopens for you, it'll be better. You wouldn't have to sit all day at home & have some fresh air outside. :) I don't wanna go back to the days when I was grounded. How terrible, I know how it feels like ok. I'm right here baby. Hugs! <3
I'm finally talking to Eliza babe! That girl's pretty & damn sexy in her photoshoot. :D Whee!I'm feeling much better. Eliza's like my medicine. Hot, sexy & pretty medicine.Whoo!I'm like your question & you gotta be my answer.<3,
11:38 AM
Mend this broken thing./
(
)
I'm like the lead singer of the band
I don't wanna mention about it at all.
It's okay, I thought.
I think I had fun.
Think of something else, babe.
Quit making me feel fucked up.
I'm gonna blog this way today.
How exciting.
NOT.
Mom bought the iPod Nano! :D
Black one.
Nothing exciting actually.
'Cos Zel is gonna use it when I don't need it.
Ugh, which means we have to share, fuck. -rolls eyes
I don't mind sharing but the kinda songs she listen to, is scary.
like MA-EE-YA-HEE, MA-EE-YA-HO!
Omgz, how I'm so in looooooooove with that song.-rolls eyes
It's damn retarded, I swear.
& she hates rock songs.
& I love them.
She'll start complaining if ever she listens to the iPod & some fucking rock song played.
She'll yell at the top of her voice & right, I kena la!
& I've got 1423 songs that I wanna put in the iPod,
just in case *cross fingers* the comp breaks down or something,
iPod's the backup.
Die, I don't wanna share.
After much persuasion, I've decided to finish up my dinner.
Slept when I came home all the way till 9pm.
Three whole hours, & I'm so glad I slept.
'Cos if I did, I'd end up sitting & thinking about baby again.
& I don't want.
Stupid iTunes is givng me problems.
Take damn long to convert songs
& it's slowing down the comp.
How annoying.
Ugh, someone's scolding me 'cos I'm like sneezing.
I think baby knocked off already but my phone's in the room, very lazy.
& dachangjin is showing nowwwwwwww!
Stupid iPod.
Oh, the song Spanish Guitar by Toni Braston is nice!
Oldies but it's really lovely.
The lyrics are also nice.
Hm, I shall post it up. :D
A smoky room, a small cafe
They come to hear you play
And drink and dance the night away
I sit out in the crowd
And close my eyes
Dream you're mine
But you don't know
You don't even know that I am there
{chorus}
I wish that I was in your arms
Like that Spanish guitar
And you would play me through the night
'Till the dawn
I wish you'd hold me in your arms
Like that Spanish guitar
All night long, all night long
I'd be your song, I'd be your song
Steal my heart with every note you play
I pray you'll look my way
And hold me to your heart someday
I long to be the one that you caress with tenderness
And you don't know
You don't even know that I exist
{chorus}
Te sientas entre la gente
Cierras tu ojos
Y suenas que soy tuyo
Pero yo no siquiera se que estas ahi
Me gustaria tenerte entre mis brazos amor
I sit out in the crowd
And close my eyes
Dream you're mine
And you don't know
You don't even know that I exist
{chorus}Nice! :D Hee. Go listen to it man.
I can't deal with this, leave me alone<3,
9:35 PM
Mend this broken thing./
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I'm meeting gf. :DI'm meeting gf. :DI'm meeting gf. :DI'm meeting gf. :DI'm meeting gf. :DLike yay! After a week, we're finally meeting up. Hohoho. x) Accompanying her down to Airport & I'm coming back home for dinner& tuition. Then I'll talk to her again tonight when she knock off. Like yay. :D We're finally spending time together. Although it isn't long but acks, I'm contented. :DSo for now, till then. I'll be back with more. x)Open up the part of you that wants to hide,<3,
2:39 PM
Mend this broken thing./
(
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Tonight I said goodbye, but I should have said more
School's fine, everything's good. I'm done with my homework & I'm damn happy. I'm only left with English comprehension. :) Baby & I had some arguement over text-messaging in school today during Chinese remedial but everything's fine now. Silly gf, I wonder how you're doing now. :) Remedial was fun. Did compo & left at 3.45pm. Went RM with Sass & had lunch. :D Long John's again. I <3> It reminds me of baby. Hee. :) Paid for Sassy 'cos she bring enough cash. Hm, LRT-ed to Compass later on. Sat at Compass Heights & talked for awhile & left at 5.30pm. :D Bloody funny conv I had with Sass &xiaomantoupapaaaaaaa. Don't talk about it, my tummy hurt so much from laughing. x)Baby baby baby. :) I miss you so much & you know that. I'm sorry about this afternoon. I guess it was my tone, sorry huns. Not again ok? Hugs tight. x)Oh wait.. I still miss Joel. >:( I wonder how is he now. Hurhur. (baby's gonna start whining about me caring so much for Joel & lesser for her. NEVER OK!)Conversation with Sharilyn over MSN is so retarded. Go to her blog for more information. Ok, I will link her up soon. :\I love y'all for commenting but I just don't have the time to reply.
Sorry babes, you know I love you. :DI swear I'd rip my heart out if you said you'd be impressed,<3,
9:50 PM
Mend this broken thing./
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I know I can’t keep living in this dead & dying dream
Each time I'm off the comp, out of my blogger account, I've got so much to say, so much to blog about. I'll try to remember then & wanted to blog about it the next time I come in but know what? I forgot. Fuck this dumb memory of mine, it's falling. ):< Then someday I'll forget about you, you, you, you & you, him, him, him, her, her & her.
Another Wednesday without you & more to go.
Or perhaps not anymore. :/
School was tiring. Damn tired. Slept at 12.15am last night & I'm still tired. Omgz, I think I should sleep at 6pm, hohoho. x) Got back some results & I'm quite happy with it though I barely passed. :)
English - 19/25
Chinese - 52/100(like omgz, I actually passed!)
Maths - 27/50
Literature - 14/25
SS - 4/25(ROFLOL)
Art - 14/25
Baby's happy for me & so is Mom & Dad. :) I'm so glad. At least I managed to pass most of them. Hahah. Mom was like "Why your SS like that!" & baby was like "HUHHHHHHHHHHHH!? How can!" Ok, bloody funny reactions they give. Well, went home to get my piano books & my dearest loveliest maid cooked my fav fried rice & I ate before I left the house to meet Bestaye & Sass. :) She's uber nice luh, I love her! Met the girls & went to sit around at Mos. Drank corn soup after such a long time & Sassy got her ice milk tea. :D Sat around & Qiaos came. She took her lunch & went home. Talked till about 4+ & went for piano. Xiao man tou papaaaaaaaaaaaa was there when I finished my lessons. Talked & laughed a lot. :D Had fun luh, disturbing them, acting all retarded. Left Mos at around 5plus, went Popular to get marker. My memory never fail to play tricks on me. I remembered I've got more than one thing to get from Popular but when I got there, I only remember I need to get the marker. Fuck man when I got home later, I realised I need to get a proper ruler. !@#$&% ARGH. Accompanied Bestaye to the mama shop to get her batteries & went home.
Baby isn't at her best tday 'cos of her disappointing results. I know no shit about whatever points but from what baby said, all I know that is, she isn't happy with it & neither her parents are happy about it. Hm, I know I can't help much & I feel so helpless. I was so worried & I kept thinking how is she & al. She was crying on the phone & acks, I feel so useless. I guess I was the reason & the cause of her disappointing results. If I hadn't disturbed her when she was studying, then she'd have done a lot better. BLAH UGH. >:@
Baby I'm sorry but I wish I could help. How I wish I was there to hold you close, give you a tiny peck on your cheek & tell you everything's gonna be fine. I wanna be there to catch your tears, they're precious to me. Hugs baby, I love you. Have all the time you want, take it & I'm sure you'll heal ok? I'm here to build up your self confidence, I'll be here all the time. Silly girl, be glad that Mom's acting this way & Dad's behaving all odd. It just shows that they care, right? :)
Ooh & baby.. I miss you so much today. More than so much. More than most. ):
Ray J's Anytime is playing & I like this song. :D hee.
Whenever I'm down, I think of you to lift me up
And if you ever need a friend
If you ever need someone to talk to
I'm right here
I'll never leave
I love you
Part of the lyrics & it's all for you. :)
Baby's sleeping & I'm missing her so much. I don't think I'll be able to see her. I'm missing her so much that I'm flipping through the photographs. Sigh, it's okay. I think I'll be able to get through all these. It isn't her fault neither does she like it being grounded.
Absence make the heart fonder.
I can't forget what you once told me, it kept replaying.
It's reminding me of how we used to be.
Baby, I wanna be able to meet you three days straight again.
>:'( BAH ok that was just random ok. I love you!
This time, watch what this weak heart can do.
Watch my heart tear, gone & shattered.
Emo.
(& that reminds me of her, who doesn't watch her waxed hair nor bathe, omgz ewww)
I've been missing you so much, I have to say
<3,
7:39 PM
Mend this broken thing./
(
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Say hello to all your superfical friends
uh?
Yesterday was horrible. I was pissed almost the whole day. Fucking hell. Anyway, the whole day we were talking about ___!! :] Hahahah, can you believe it! What a topic to talk about for almost a day. Well hur, not as innocent as we thought yes. We had fun talking, so much to catch up actually. I'm so glad to be back in school, with my lovelies. :) Art was good, Miss Teh isn't agitated or whatever. I did my work like always. :) Hahah.
Oh & by the way, Happy belated 7th Months to my dearest Sassy & 'Xiao Man Tou Papaaaaaaaaaaaaaa'! :D Ok, went Compass with the rest after school except for Mich 'cos she's got AC rehearsal. Had lunch at Burger King, talked a lot & decided to move our asses to Compass Heights. :D Talked a hell lot again & we had so much fun la. Sassy was the only one with the least stories. Hahah. I'm happy & found out that.. 1/ People do change over the years, which is both good & bad, 2/ Qiaos helped me took revenge. HEH HEH HEH now you gotta taste your medicine baby! Oh yeah oh yeah!(darn evil but acks!) 3/ I'm so glad it's the four of us again, like back to the past. AY BUT WAIT, the next time Mich gotta be in la, wtf. Hahah. :) 4/ ______ has became Qiaos topic of the day. :) 5/ Frankly, I've never been so afraid of someone before. Oh my. =X 6/ I didn't know what my ideal gf was like now I do, with the help of they three. :D Thanks sexayes. :) 7/ I do love baby the way she is no matter how far she is away from my ideal gf. Actually it doesn't really matter. :*
Uh huh, bought some stuff & went back at 5plus reaching 6pm. :D Dinner, online, did my homework & off to talk to baby. We've been going through bad patches recently but I guess everything's fine for now. :/ I'm still trying, never stop. Oh & I've talked things out with her. I don't wanna mention names. I was being fucking nice by talking to her nicely & all but all she did was show some fucked up attitude like she don't fucking care whether I clear things up or not. Well, if she doesn't care, then can't she just tell me fuck. Omgz, she pissed me off like crazy, I swear. I didn't wanna bust her or whatever, I have no such intentions but before we could even start talking, she just kept trying to find ways to bust me. Thanks, ugh. >:@ Like what baby said, such friends are everywhere. Since she's more concerned about her studies & having friends in school aren't important to such a studious & busy person like her, be that way. I didn't know she was so fucking busy. I can't see it. 'Cos I guess if she was then she wouldn't have the time to even tell others that we are such bitches. Ok whatever I don't wanna continue before she come right into my face & shout.
Forgive & forget, honey. Just pretend, it'd work.
Oh & I've decided that I will NEVER EVER vent my anger on others anymore. I would at least try. I'd rather abuse myself than to yell at her & get scolded 'cos I just wanted someone to listen & vent my anger on & get all depressed again. Fuck, don't talk about it luh. Everything just weren't right yesterday. Zel was being a bitch last night by being damn guailan. I don't know how to explain, check it yourself. Talked to baby till around 230am & slept.
Today, woke up & I was fucking damn tired. I wish I didn't have to attend school. Ugh & tmr's like only Wednesday! ): It's ok, endureeeeeeeee. Hm so morning, Qiaos, Mich & I bitched about ____ again. Ugh I think we're damn evil 'cos two ____ & one was once her bestfriend. I feel such a bitch early in the morning. Went up to the hall & there's like fugly curtains surrounding the hall! Omgz, it made the whole place even worse, it's damn hot la the place. Ugh, I wonder who gave the idea. PE was retarded as usual. SS was just plain copying. Oh & we got back our results. I failed but I didn't expect to get so much. Single-digit, 8/25. :D Still happy 'cos I just barely flipped through, not much of reading. :D CME was stupid please! Miss Toh asked those in r/s to stand up & she guessed my name. Omgz & bestaye was like yesyesyes!!! -.- Stupid bestaye. She asked which factor is important to maintain a r/s. Hm, Qiaos was like laughing & knows my intentions when I was answering. BAH! Recess was fun. :D Like the recess we had before holz. :D Hee. Art! Miss Teh was damn nice & hyper. She made us ice milo, my fav! :D Drew a little, talked here & there. :) Miss Teh threw a fake pest on the table & went "HOO!". She was trying to make us feel scared & scream but attempt failed, sorry. :) She's nice, for once. Whee!
Had some performance for AC & it was okay. Our school can never beat other schools la so yeah. Tsk, fugly. Amy was sitting behind & scmreaming like crazy. Oh my, hahah. Serene was sitting two rows in front of me which makes Amy three rows away from Serene. They were like to each other like those three rows never existed. HAWHAWHAW. Amy said that she's gonna dance like the indian dancers in the indian dance section the next time she goes clubbing. Roflol! Funny mates. :)
Immediately after we're dismissed, had lunch & went back to the artroom. :) Drew a little & daydreamt. Bloody boring, Sassy was happily with Xiao Man Tou Papaaaaaaa playing, Qiaos went to the toilet & never return(she went off to talk to Kelly & Leisha till the day ended), Bestaye was with Carla all the time. Miss Teh came at 5plus, checked our work & cabbed down to Compass. Got my graph papers & went home. Qiaos happily went to meet _______. :) Whoohoo!
Online, showered, dinner. :) I'm still messaging baby. She's happily watching dachangjin with her mama. Omgz, I feel so abandoned & I've been the one waiting for her text the entire day. No it's ok, glynis. You were never supposed to stop trying. Fuck. _l_
I'll reply th comments another time or in your blogs or something ok. :) Oh btw I'm gonna change girlissues's link already. x) Erika made ohsoclueless instead. :) Hahah 'cos when she asked her friends to read girlissues, they thought it was porn. Roflol. :)
We should never happen,
I miss you so much,
<333,
6:52 PM
Mend this broken thing./
(
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But all I could do is close my eyes, & cross my heart & hope to dieFRIDAY
I went baby's place early in the morning. Snuggled a little in bed, baby went off to shower while I was reading Joel's Chicken Soup! Hahah. I like Chicken Soup books, aw. :) Baby looked damn smart in her uniform. I burst out laughing. I never seen her so formal before la. Hahah. Damn weird 'cos she's always in her polo tee + jeans, that's all. But afterall, I think I laughed not because she look weird but 'cos I weren't use to be. It's nice seeing my gf so smart. :)
Doesn't she look good standing in her underwear?
Okay, that was a part of Konstantine which is playing now, this song is like 9.35mins long, WHAO.
Ok back to Friday. Joel was asking me what kinda online games I play &&..
baby : Oh, she play maple story(laughing)
me : NO!!?!?!?!! OMG NO!!!!!!!!!!!!
joel : Then?
me : Erm, neopets. =X
joel : (laughing) Lame ay! (on the com, he was going into neopets.com)
me : Aiya, I play for my sister ma. I help her earn points only la!
I have him bonus.com & he still finds it lame. _l_ Omgz, annoying siblings. Oh & he ask me how to play every game like I've played them before. Like the online basketball game!? Ok do I even look like I play them? No way! I really don't play online games.
Anyway, we left her house at around 12plus. Baby was like some MIB(Man-In-Black), black tee, black pants, black SOCKS(!!) & shoes. How black. Hahah. The thing that made it worse wasn't the outfit, it was the weather. The sexy hot sunny bright mr sun was shining like there's no tomorrow. Ugh, how annoying. Took a LRT down to the next stop, some station(I forgot the name) & helped baby's friend with some registration thingo. :) My dear girl isn't 18 only till Nov so she couldn't help. Walked back to the LRT station & baby told me could've walked from her place to the next. I swear if she made me walk all the way, I'd rather she cab there. I was in fucking heels, like HELLO? & obviously, my girl do know how it feels like wearing heels, right baby? :) I shan't say more. TEEHEE. :D
LRT-ed down to Chao Chu Kang & took a train down to Bugis! :) Many many people & we bumped into baby's classmate. (: got to Bugis & we were constantly asking each other the same question for 15 mins, "what do you wanna eat?" & I decided to say Long John since it's our all-time fav & we went to look at the directery & there's no LJ. Went to ask one of the people there & I finally remember that we had to cross over the other side when he told us how to get there. Hahah how dumb. Ate combo #1 again! x) Uber happy. I gave a little of my food to babyb & she was complaining she's becoming fatter & I'm becoming thinner. & she said that usually daddys grow fatter when they're married or they had kids, she needn't had to wait. She'll become fat just plain being with me. Hahah! She's was damn funny luh. She was muniching her food like some ahbeng & I yelled "Can you like close your mom when you eat? You wanna let everyone see what you eating or what!? Be more gentle can or not?" After saying that, I realised I shouldn't have said that. Xavier = bung = gentle? NO! HELL NOOOOO. After lunch, we walked around. Walked passed the neoprints shop & I was prestering baby "Uhhhhhh, Take leh. Take la. Take leh. Whalau I kena busted already, I don't wanna ask." I swear she loves busting me, mutherfocker. & know what, she finally agreeed. :D She took the neos 'cos I was afraid mom would open up my handbag & see it & I won't be going home so I can't hide it anywhere. Uh huh & took a train down to airport. Baby had to work luh, spoil the day only. ):<>YES I LOVE YOU. :D Hahah assuming everything I say she'd listen to me, HAH!
My maid & I left at 9plus 'cos I wanna watch tv & she wanted to rest. Hahah. :) My phone batteries almost died on me please. So I was using Zel's phone to text baby & Qiaos. I slept on the floor last night & it's damn painful. Omgz, I woke up 9 this morning. Hahah. How early on a Saturday morning. Shopped a little & went for breakfast at Hai Tian Lo! Omg it's been long since the whole family went there. :) Fun fun fun. Went home after that. The sweet peas came over when I got home - Qiaos & Mich! :D Talked a lot & laughed like some mad women at my place. Bitched a lot about ____. I feel so bad but acks, sometimes bitching is good. The next time anyone ask Qiaos to be their girlfriend, she's gonna tell th person "no, my friend say cannot stead, sorry" HAHAHAHA! Damn retarded la she. I'm gonna call Qiaos every half an hour, Mich is gonna call Qiaos every hour tmr to check that she's home. Hahah the whole holiday she was never at home! Hahah damn funny. We were talking about Qiaos's mom giving her too mcuh money& someday she'll stop giving 50 at a go, she'll only give two bucks for drinks or chicken rice. Hahah! two bucks even if she's going Zouk. Then her mom would go, "(with waterbottle in her hands) girl ah, don't waste money on drinks la. Bring water bottle there ok." HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA I SWEAR I COULDN'T STOP LAUGHING. Mich was doing the action & that ah soh face. Hahah! Then the worst situation would be.. "(holding waterbottle & lunchbox) girl ah, I'm not giving you money. You eat the food when you're hungry ok? Drink water from the bottle instead. Don't waste money, no money to give you la!" OMGGGGGGGGGSXZ! Funny funny funny. I told mom & she was happy like some kid. Lol. :)
Oh Qiaos bought jellybeanz & they had heart-shaped ones. How cute. I ate one & she was yelling. Retarded bitch. Qiaos has decided to change her name. Instead of Jennifer Yip Qiao Lin. She wants it Treasure Yip Zhen Si. :) Unique, definitely. How unique & weirddddddd. It's like asking you to treasure the girl name called Yip Zhen Si. Retarded & we were thinking of situations where people find it a joke. Qiaos met this new friend called Cherish & we were saying if.. "one day, down the road you all say 'ay you know ah, Cherish & Treasure together leh!' then the person will be like 'huh, is that a joke?'" & we burst out laughing. Qiaos said, "when I go & apply for jobs! 'Hi, my name is Treasure Yip' & the person say 'Are you playing a prank on me?' then I'll show her my IC, TREASURE YIP!" She's damn retarded so yeh. the three of us just cannot be together. We'll laugh like crazy & probably forget our names. :)
Took pictures!
I think something's wrong with the codes, I'm rushing for time so I'll just leave it now.
Going over to Aunt's place to babysit, aw. ):
I'll reply the tags next ok.
But all I could do is close my eyes, & cross my heart & hope to die
<3,
6:59 PM
Mend this broken thing./
(
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I'll believe all your lies, just pretend you love me
I'm so damn bored at home. I've been online the whole day since 8. Hahah I lead a boring life. :) Uploaded the pictures in the cam & did some editing. :D Printed out my & Sassy's art research.
Disney On Ice yesterday was nice. :) Went with Val, Allan, Nat, Pearlyn & Rhys + Sis. Got there 5 mins before the show started. Hahah thanks to Zel. Argh but it's okay. the show ended at 9.30pm. & we took pictures with the fake Mickey. Bloody hell, 22bucks they said we're taking pictures with Mickey, hell no. It's the one where you take & they paste it WITH Mickey. Hahahah how funny. Bloody angmo. Anyhows, the pictures turned out nice but I don't like 'cos I look like crap. Since when I look good anyway. Drove Val home & the kids back to Jalan Songket first then Allan drove us home. Got home at 11, dead beat. Washed up & al, watched America's Next Top Model & called baby - my stitches boy. :) Hahah. New name new name! Gawdddddddd, how clumsy she can get! Aw, but I miss that tiny one so much. She was screaming on the phone just now, how silly. If she can manage to talk to her mom, she'd get outta the house early before going to work. :D:D:D
OHOHOH! Joel, cheer up ok? :) There's sunshine after rain. Everything will be fine soon. Don't give up the whole forest for one tree ah. Cheer up! <3
Sassy said we're having an outing tmr & I obviously don't know what's going on. Hahah. No one told me anything! Not even the details, ugh. Bestaye, or whoever knows the detailsl & al, please contact me. ;D Thanks babies!
REPLIES!
babyboy, don't you dare forget the pact we made that day. I swear I'll murder you. HEHEHEHE :] damn evil. I love you too. :) hugs tightly, my one & only. MUAHS!
jasmine, haha you could, go ahead yeah. (:
qiaolin, heheheheheh :] you want ah? jiu shi pian pian don't wanna give you. Hahah I miss disturbing you man. Ok, Adriano don't own a blog, sadly. =/ I'm serious. Hahah REALLY! if you thihnk I'm disturbing you. Hahah. :)
jerlene, ooh, I love lit! Why not! Homework are so ugh, irritating. They give us work like there's a month of holidays when it's only one pathetic week.
josh, hello you, I'm still working on your skin. =\ Sorry!
weiLin & passerby, Sure sure, hahah.
Khim
Teresa
Yang Ce
Sheena
Shermaine
Kenneth
Zhi Yang
There you go babe! I think that should be all. :)
I ought to find someone else but all I find is myself, keep thinking of you,
<3,
5:06 PM
Mend this broken thing./
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I'm missing you to death but it's all for the best I know
Yesterday was somehow the best day of the week. :) I finally get to meet baby after forever - okay, 6 days. I've decided to be uber nice & drop by her place since my dearest her is fucking grounded(how funny). Glynis went over to the other side of Singapore yesterday. I swear I was trembling like mad. No one ever made me travel on my own, to a farfarfaraway, unknown place. & she, made me travel on my own. &&, after all that stupid confusion LRT had caused me with her damn messy instructions, SHE STILL CAN LAUGH. I don't wanna go into details but I guess you know why I'm so mad. =\I can't remember what time I got there. Lazed around & she helped me complete my chinese homework. :D Did my english & it's almost finished. So I'm only left with a little of eng, that stack of maths & lit essay. :) Joel's damn irritating but afterall he's okay la. Hahah. Very retarded & beng with all that short forms he have. OF = Old fashioned. Jeez! Left her place at 4.30pm, took a bus back.
Baby thankyou & I had fun. Next time move to somewhere not so complicating ok! xD
OMG KNOW WHAT, I WON'T BE ABLE TO SEE HER UNTIL SCHOOL STARTS FOR HER. OH NO, PERHAPS I WON'T SEE HER FOREVER. Okay, I shouldn't scare myself. She said she'd try & talk to her mom. Actually, why on earth would you be grounded when you're.. 18?Got home 5 mins before 6, haha. Showered & waited for Dad to finished bathing & went off to Spore Swimming Club. Had dinner with the rest & did a little of my maths there. Reached home around10 & watched my dachangjin! :D they're showing changjin tmr I think, damn cuteeeeeeeee. x)I was wrong, baby I'm sorry. I was really tired of waiting after so long, that's why I just texted you that way.. That girly fell at home last night & had stitches. =\ Omg like fucking pain la. Sigh & she only told me this morning. Sigh I'm going out with Mummy tday. :) Going town to shop before piano lessons. Omg I dread to go please. Damn teacher keep scolding me. Ok whatever, it's the examination that I'm going for. Campus Superstar on Monday, thank God Geraldine's in. :D Khim's out. I read her blog & she's amazingly WHAO. She types like tHiiS.. aNnD iiTs sH0 n0rTx niiCe.. -slaps forehead. Yangce's blog is damn decent. Hahah. All about school stuff. Sheena & shermaine, that twin too. Shermaine blogs about normal stuff luh. Nothing much actually. Hahah. America's Next Top Model tonight! I think the runway's left with Bre, Nik & Nicole. Ew, I dislike Bre luh. Jayla's out last week. I like Jayla! She's so pretty. :) Nicole's this cycle's winner. :D Hahah.Okay, I'm going out now. Black dresses flood the cemetery in this cliche tragedy,<3,
9:25 AM
Mend this broken thing./
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My hopes are so high that your kiss might kill me
Someday we will all come & go; just like how you did.We had a tough night yesterday but she call up this morning to apologize. (: so everything's all good again. Thanks NL, you make my morning. Muahs. =D So we hogged on for an hour & half till about 11 & she went off to make breakfast for the brat at her home. :) We were webcam-ing. How fun, I haven't done that in awhile. I was laughing my head off 'cos she kept doing hand gestures, pinch Joel & al. Hahah. Damn hilarious la dey. (: I didn't know she had a webcam until tday, ok how dumb. AY WAIT. I SHOULD HAVE PRINT SCREEN! OMGZZZ. & I'll fucking post it here. Hahah. :D How funny she look in the morning. xPTalked to my dear Cheryl Lio. :) She's working. Hahah, catch up a little. :D YAY. I'm starting to miss school on the first day of holiday. I miss those sexayes; Sass, Qiaos, Bestaye, Mich & Nettes. ): I miss school. Like I told Kristle this morning, I rather stay in school, drive myself crazy with Art & all the other homework. But at least, I've got great company like them. I love y'all. Muahs! :DFor the whole entire morning, I bet she haven't showered yet. -pinch nose. EEYUR WHY YOU SO DISGUSTING! Hahah but I love, still. :) Can you believe it, she's fucking grounded whereas missy here isn't. =/ How weird. It's always me, it was never my other half. I'm going out tmr, yay. The dumb modelling agency called me up just now. They want me to go down later on tmr. Bah & I must let my parents now & my parents can come down. Hmm.On the phone with that smelly now. :D Hahah.CELESTE CHEN PING IS FUCKING HAWT! Ok sorry cel. =/ Hahah. I sound so damn PL but whatever. She is really hawt what. :)Homework's driving me crazy.
I miss Sarah Lau, really.Three questions a day keep the failures away. :DI miss Chanel Choo.Oh yeah, kena ah you, kena ah!I miss Yip Qiao Lin.Sorry Qiaos, we all don't like you. :)I miss Michelle Lim.Jency John! I miss recess time. Omgz, how gay. :DMichellelim, I did miss you ok. It's just that I don't show, you pig. Read the damn entry & you'll know ok. You want me to say right, ok I say. I miss you leh Michelle. Why you three days never come school? Xiangx si ni lerhz wors. =DCheryl, I like talking to you. It has never been this interesting. :D I love you lah. We'll talk more another time ok? Hugs.Eilis, Hahah you were coughing so bad luh. Take care of yourself ok. Ay wait, you were sick & you still can watch movie huh! Hahah. I like to skip school. Bleah =P -sings Nothing's gonna stop us now. Pert, Yeap, I will. =D Thanks! Remember what I told you ok! Hugs. You, all that I need,<3,
12:55 PM
Mend this broken thing./
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So sick of love songs, so tired of tearsRaffles Hotel, School play. :D
I love they two. :)
I was REALLY on the phone, haha.
strucks, I look awfully retarded.
I'm still sick. Ain't getting any better. Slept at 4pm yesterday, woke up at 9pm. Ate dinner, watch a little to telly, called honey up. Told her we couldn't meet up tday 'cos I've got family dinner with the opera people again. But it's okay, we're going to airport to study on monday morning. :D Went back to sleep at 12plus, I couldn't sleep. =\ Woke up tday at 9plus, lazed around in bed til around 10. Honey texted me at 10.11pm. :D Happiest minute of the day.
This Indo-Chinese guy was talking to me this morning. Darwis, his name. Nice name. Hahah I became his English tcher, how fun. My head is still spinning but I refuse to go to bed. =/ My maid isn't feeling good either, I think she got the virus from me. ):
Jace is a little colourblind, poor son. But it's okay. I'd be her colour identifier cum mummy! :D Heh. That didn't help much but she knows for all time, she has got me to depend on. (: I'm finishing up the tissues at home, die glynis die. I guess I was worn out by exams. Now that I'm sick, I ought to get sufficient rest but no, I refuseeeeeee. I'm still thinking what I can do on the computer, something productive. I think they're coming home, I should get my fat ass off the computer before they start yakking. Thank God bestaye isn't in trouble, thank God. :) I wonder why Sassy has got so much time, patience & determination to do her art research whereas missy here don't have any of those. Just plain laziness you see. :)
I like to eat fried rice. I had fried rice for lunch & dinner yesterday. Yum! :] But currently, I'm craving for Jalan Kayu's Roti Prata & perhaps a little showers of blessing from the butter prata man. :D I want some red pearl milk tea from Kovan. I want more magazines to keep me entertain as I rest to make sure I get well before Monday comes. I want someone to help me finish up the chinese homework. 'Cos outta 10 questions, I merely know one or two. I want someone to tell my mom that actually I wanted to spend time with them this afternoon, that's why I didn't wanna go out with the rest & I'll dine with them in the night instead. How I wish she knew about this. ): I want her to know not attention seeking but I want her to know I still care about the family. I want someone to give me some magik pills for Headaches, Fever, Flu & Cough so that I can get well soon & quit being sickly. I just Honey a mail & I want her to read it now. I desperately want her to know how I feel right at this very moment.
I'll go off to sleep now. >):
Nothing else but you, to stay by my side.
<3,
1:10 PM
Mend this broken thing./
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Listen to the whispers until somehow I hear melodies
Talking to Sharilyn was good. :) I realised she changed a whole lot. So sensible, so understanding. (: I'm happy for her, her parents & her gf. She used to be so rebellious & I absolute hate the way she was but no longer. These hatred turned into love for my tiny one. :) Well, sisterhood hur.
Joel isn't feeling good. ): Just like her sister, omgz. So fierce for what luh bastard. >:@Mrs Soon called up early this morning & disturbed mummy's sleep. Stupid la. Went to the polyclinic just now. Saw many people there. Xiuwen, Eilis, Janet & Shermin, Chai Khin, Sass & Yj. Xiuwen say Mrs Soon told her mom that 20 over people didn't attend school tday. I bet she was calling like amd & I bet our class was the shortest in line during assembly. :D Hahaha. Sexiest class luh. It cost me $6.10. RAH! Went home at around 1240. I was damn sick, very uncomfortable. Now it's getting worse. Cough, sneezing like crazy & headache. It's real this time. I shall turn into bed & catch few winks. You'll never be a part of my past,<3,
3:56 PM
Mend this broken thing./
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A trained heartbreaker.
I need to breathe.
I'm so damn tired of pretending that I'm all good when you say those hurtful words, I'm so sick of hiding from you. I hate it. Fuck off luh.
She's making me lock up my blog, lock up everything. She wants me to be open about my stuff, & I did. I don't wanna hide, I hate it but she made me to. Fuck luh. This damn computer's account too, I'm gonna switch to my account. Yuh she's probably reading this but acks, this is where I say what I want, it's where I open up. I was on the phone with Nellie & she insisted it was a guy, whatever luh. Let hecr check for all I care. My dearest Nellie got damn sexy girly voice. :D Hahah. She is just pissing me off so bad. That is pirvacy to her man.
& I miss you today. ♥
Tons of homework to do. ): Whole pile of chinese, maths & even english! ): I'm dying.
school + homework + tests = stress + ugh + fuck.
I failed my Chemistry test, again. 4/25 this time. Yuh go ahead & laugh your balls off. I really don't know what's wrong with me. I did study. Sigh perhaps the method weren't right. Single digit for Chem used to be so aiya-its-okay-la-it-was-never-a-double but now, it matters. For one, I wanna love Chemistry. For two, I wanna do well for it, because of baby. I definitely wanna do my girl proud. :)
Chinese remedial was fun. My compo got tons of red marks. Hahah Mr Sim say can write in chinese so I did & he was like, "mei qin, yours very good ah, least corrections to do already. jia yi ah, yours also. just that yours got a lot of red marks." He's damn funny. Time really flies during the remedial, I like luh. :D Mr Sim keep running in & outta the classroom. Hahah. Did some N level paper & went back. Walked around compass for half an hour & went home. :)
So, where were you when I needed you so bad?
Mom & dad are out now. Mom wanna see a doctor so she can get a MC for tmr. Hahha St Joseph's Feast Day/ SJC 34th Sports Day tmr, I'm skipping it. Too damn boring & I'll be alone. I don't want. I rather stay home & rot. Nono, I'll be a good girl & do my work. I'll call up smartass when I need help. Hubs wouldn't be around 'cos she's having some course at the airport. The same goes for tday. It lasts for threeeeeee fucking damn days from 830 - 5pm daily. Fuck luh.
My eyelid is swollen again, fuck. It always happen. RAH! It happens & I don't know what to do.
I like Amanda DarhL's tshirts. Click here. I love it & I bet y'all would love them too. :D It's all kinda rock kind, I like. I'm considering to get them. I'm helping her to promote it here ok. :D Hahah.
http://ehacked.com/wp-print.php?p=17&page=1
Well, I don't dare to read it. Darn scary but it's something you should know man.
http://www.ebyte.org/forum/viewtopic.php?t=14500
I feel like killing that woman. Fucker. Ought to be hanged man. Yuck!
Eliza dear, talk soon. ):
Natsha Quek, I'm missing you luh. )):
Kristle, I miss you lah. ):
Buddy, I miss you so bad. ):
Sexiest(heehee), I love you. :D
Thanks to those who left comments. Much appreciated. :) Missy here don't have much time to reply them, so sorrrrrrrrry. ): Keep commenting & I will love yall. :D HEE.
The one you should call was standing here all along,
< /3,
5:46 PM
Mend this broken thing./
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<3
I wish you knew this song was about youhttp://loveris.blogspot.comRead hers. Somehow it makes me reflect on my life. Not because she’s 24 & she has a daughter, 6 years old this year. It’s her courage to face this cruel world again. Her painful past, how she fall apart. I admire her. :) Read the entry about her daughter telling her she can’t love both her parents ‘cos they’re divorced. It’s painful, fuck man.I’m sending songs to Qiaos on msn & on yousendit.com. That horny one is deprived for songs. HAHAHAHA :DSchool is uber tiring today. ): Art, Art, Art!!! I hate Mondays & Tuesdays lah. I finally learnt my Speed Time Graph :D Heh. I knew nothing about it until tday. I only know about uh, retardation, deceleration & -ve acceleration. Hahah I know it’s all connected la huh. But tday I finally did two outta three questions on my ownnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn. :D I’m proud of myself, aren’t you proud of me? :D SS was boring, AS USUAL. :D But I sat with Qiaos tday. Hahah ‘cos I didn’t liked my place there. It’s making me fall asleep. Heh. :D Wrote a note to Nette, heehee. :) CME was the fun-est one of all the lessons we had tday. We had some NE quiz in the com lab. Hahha Imma senior man! Ok whatever luh.Art was terrible. But Bestaye, Qiaos & I talked quite a little. :) Very fun though it was only for awhile. I like disturbing Qiaos. I like getting on serious with Bestaye. I like crapping with Sassy. They all make me happy, very happy. Oh last but not least, Michelle. She’s one that never look like she was there but in fact, she was there all the time. :) I thank God for them. <3Had art after school. Ugh darn boring but Carla was there. & she amused me with her retarded-ness. She’s damn funny la. “Tissue paper, one dollar” ROFLOL :D Kelly, Leisha & Crystal together with Qiaos. Funniest. “So you wanna go zoo or not?” I was like HUH? &I looked at the time. Hahah I didn’t know why the fuck I did that for but yuh. :D Then I was like GO ZOO? WHEN? Crystal said, ZOUK LA ZOO &all of us started laughing. They’re damn nice to crap with la. :D Met honey after that. :) Accompanied Qiaos to get dinner & she went back. Sass & __ with honey &I went to roam around. Hahah. Damn funny luh. Went back around 6pm.Thanks for commenting babes. :) Keep doing so ok?I love y’all. <3Baby & I are getting on better. :) Yesterday’s talk helped a lot, thank God.I love you. :)I’m an addict on dramatics,<3,
10:15 PM
Mend this broken thing./
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I quit trying, you fucker.
I’m tired. Seriously. I don’t wanna try so hard anymore. I quit. Goodbye to all kinda tries, fuck them all. I’m so tired. I hate it when I’m trying so bloody hard & YOU are just sitting on it. Thanks honey. You’re sucha sweetie. Fuckshit.
Same goes for Saturday. Goodbye to all sorts of omg-I-am-seeing-her-again, surprises. My happy planning gone down the drain. It’s okay. Val said, as long as you both love each other, one piece of paper from you to her would definitely mean a lot to her.
Yeah man, how true.
Baby, thanks for today. I appreciate it tons. I love you. :)
♥
I’m utterly shattered, but it’s okay.
She doesn’t really bother anyway.
I quit trying, hoho.
Thank you, but I’m falling apart,
< /3,
10:10 PM
Mend this broken thing./
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Thought in bed with pain.
This time I bought nothing to you but pain & hurt inside the rent heart of yours. I know whatever I've said, whatever I'm gonna say isn't gonna help. But baby, listen to me for the last time. I'm sorry. I know it's helpless but that's the only word I can in the English dictionary to describe how I truly feel & that's what I wanna tell you. I'm getting all apologetic. Fuck everything. It's been so long since I last felt this way. Helpless, miserable, awful, melancholy, forlorn. All negative. But well, I think I deserve such treatment. It's okay. =\Forget it. Nothing's gonna change, no matter what I've said. If her break away was because of what happened, if her loving for me was lesser, I deserve it. Son of a bitch, fucking whore. LJ's for private thoughts. I do keep an LJ & I need a layout. Omg, someone teach me how to get one. LJ's in a total mess, hoho. The current one look for lituature. Hahah give me the Anne Frank & Emma feeling. Rofl. I quite like it but I like Pearlene's & Amd's better. So much better, omggggggg.The whole entire family quarrelled just now & I'm left alone at home. I'm supposed to do my homework. Bleah! Bio test tmr, ugh I can't be much bothered.Oh wait, Joel said he'd text me on Saturday but no, he didn't. ): But I still love. :D How cuteeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee. :))Eliza babe, thanks for your concern. :) Things haven't been good but I'm almost fine yuh? I love you ok. I don't know how to get you babe! Hahah I only got your blog add, blah! Take care, hugs!Steph<3 Thanks darling. I'm almost fine, don't worry ok? Love!Eilis! She'll be back soon after all the letdowns are gone. :) dotcha worry ok? Hugs u. :)Atiqa, Josh, hihihihi. :D Thanks for commenting. Love you twoooooooo. :)Tingshan, everything's fine I guess. School's been so fuckedup & life's never been good. Hurrrr.Meiyang, hey babe. :)Thanks for for commenting. Loved! :DI better off rock alone,<3,
1:46 PM
Mend this broken thing./
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MidwestLoveAffair-@Blogspot
I'm so damn bored at home. I've been online the whole day since 8. Hahah I lead a boring life. :) Uploaded the pictures in the cam & did some editing. :D Printed out my & Sassy's art research.
